Tag: essays
All the articles with the tag "essays".
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Deoptimizing My Life
SubstackIs it bad to want to know less?
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Eggs Still on Ice
SubstackAm I really just delaying grief?
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Holes in the Ceiling
SubstackAs the nurse brought in my breakfast at 7:30 a.m., I realized I hadn’t left my hospital bed in a week: I had officially taken up residence on a 36 x
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Are athletes obligated to speak out on social media?
SubstackIt’s Saturday afternoon and I’m following New York Times updates regarding the horrific killing 1 of Alex Pretti by a group of ICE agents. Two weeks ago, we watched as videos came out showing the…
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Now.
SubstackIn flipping through an old notebook the other day, I found a chicken scratch across a page: I'm not sure when or why I wrote it, but like most serendipitous things in life, I rediscovered it at…
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Maybe Your Body Isn't Cut Out For This
Substack(and other lies I've believed)
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"Not the Worst Case Scenario"
SubstackI would have canceled the appointment but I have extreme guilt about canceling on doctors last minute. It had been feeling progressively better over the past 72 hours and I'm aware that my health…
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Highs and Lows: The Importance of HiLo
Substack(Hint: it's what it took to get here)
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The Great Unsettling
Substack“What do you want?” my boyfriend asked me the other day. “Uhhh for dinner?” I responded, not quite sure what to make of the question so naturally I went for the low-hanging fruit (which is not…
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I said I'd be done with this by 40
SubstackI sat cross-legged in the corner of the large sectional couch, eyes darting around to the six other women who sat in a circle in the living room with me. "I mean, that's why I'm here before I go to…"
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Temporary.
SubstackFor better or worse, the past decade plus of my life has been measure in racing seasons. 2024 was the first year since I ran my first race in 2011 that I haven’t gotten to a start line, let alone a…
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"I Wish This Was a Stress Fracture"
Substack“I can’t believe I’m saying this,” I admitted to my physical therapist the other day, “but I wish this was a stress fracture. I’d give anything for this to be a stress fracture. Give me crutches, a…
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It's a Pause, Not a Goodbye
SubstackI’ve been thinking a lot lately about how multiple things can be true at once: how many things are actually “ands” instead of “buts”. I can want to fight like hell to keep getting to start lines, and…
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"Past My Prime"
Substack“We won’t need to file Schedule C anymore after this year,” I told my accountant this winter, “I’m no longer getting any sponsor money.” “Oh, Amelia - I’m sorry!” she replied, with that mildly…
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Mirrors
SubstackI walked into a completely empty apartment in Golden, Colorado. Empty, except for a full-length freestanding mirror propped up in the master bedroom closet. I've avoided mirrors most of my life.…
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Recovery has no endpoint.
SubstackIn June 2000, six months after being discharged from the pediatric ward at Emanuel Hospital, my treatment team officially declared me recovered, complete with a paper certificate (I kid you not). At…
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Finding Myself Again
SubstackThis past week, I was bopping along on a weekday run down my familiar dirt path, jamming out to the best of Sunny Day Real Estate (hello teenage emo years!) and a realization suddenly dawned on me:…
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Maybe.
SubstackI fought back tears and growing panic as I said to my therapist, “ok so I know it’s a super low risk but my fear is that I will be one of those few people who gets that rare side effect and it will…
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Childless or Child-free?
SubstackThe other day, my dental hygienist made small talk as she cleaned my teeth: “so, do you have any kids?” “Nope,” I sputtered through a mouthful of dental instruments, and quickly changed the subject…
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"If it Warms Up, it Can't be a Stress Fracture"
SubstackAnd other things I've found to be all wrong about bone injuries